This past week has proven to me once again that society has a long way to go before we can consider ourselves open minded and accepting. Last week my partner broke his ankle and required surgery to implant a steel plate and screws to hold it together. Needless to say I have spent a lot of time in hospital waiting rooms. Like other tatters I tried to use some of the time to tat and take my mind off of his surgery ect. While tatting I encountered three types of people 1) those who were impressed that there are still people around that know how to tat. Especially a male. 2) Those who thought tatting was nice, but that it was a weird thing for a male to do and 3) I was a weird male because I was tatting.
I find it funny how people judge what a male should do and not do. If I cook at home I am a wimp but if I cook a banquet for 1000 then I am a chef. If I know how to sew I am a wimp yet if I get very good at it I am one of the worlds top clothing designers. It is like this in many areas of life. Sometimes it would be nice if people would just think about these things before they judge what I am doing. It would be nice if both males and females could do whatever jobs or hobbies they wished and not be judged because of it. Yes I know I am wishing for a perfect world.
13 comments:
Good for you for breaking the mold Clyde! I totally agree with you.
You are a tatting ambassador and as such, part of your responsibility is to educate and break stereotypes. Don't let the ignorance of others bring you down.
People can really be insensitive and rude at times, can't they?
I was a full time Mom by choice and I can't count the times other WOMEN said things that made it perfectly clear they equated that with being a "kept woman" (to put it nicely) or else they would say something that eluded they were thinking I probably wasn't smart enough to do anything else. Don't even get me started on the age difference thing! LOL
Wouldn't it be so wonderful if we could all treat each other with respect and kindness?
I'm so sorry to hear that your partner had such a bad accident and I wish him an uneventful and speedy recovery.
Once again, I am so proud of you. You would think in this so called "age of enlightenment" that things would be better in this particular area. You have every right to do what you are good at and show the world your capabilities. Sherry is right - you are a tatting ambassador, among many more important things. You are doing a good job and no one has a right to put you down for anything. I have also been in the position of Grizzly Mountain Arts about being a stay at home by choice and being looked down on. If only we could all treat each other as we would like to be treated. Wait - haven't I heard something like that before.......
Once again you did a good with your words, Clyde.
I must say my tatting role model is my Great Uncle Francis. It never occured to me to think tatting wasn't something a man would, or could do as well as a woman.
I wish your partner well in his recovery!
How VERY true. Works t'other way for us women too!! There are certain things that women 'don't do' in the eyes of the public.
Carry on tatting, my man. Carry on spreading the word.
Jane
Thank you for the encouragement Sherry. I try to educate about tatting every chance that I get. Grizzly Mountain Arts it is a shame that everyone cannot share a bit of respect and kindness. Oh so true Laura, a little bit of kindness goes a long way. Bonnie it would be nice if more people in the general public could think like you do.
Thank you Jane. I am going to carry on tatting. I figure if people have a problem with it that is there problem, my goal is to try and spark an interest for tatting in others.
I hear the same stuff when I mention men tatting at the events I go to. Even my sons, who were taught differently, tend to make comments. Sometimes I think we're making progress and then sometimes I think we got kicked back 50 years.
Best wishes on your partner's full recovery and very quickly too!
:-) Gina
Sorry to hear that you experienced such sensitivity, especially when dealing with such a difficult time with your partner's health.
Clyde, I was relating your unpleasant tatting experience to Dave today, and he reminded me that he too had had his masculinity questioned because he MADE tatting and fiber art tools! One of our customers (who is NOT a fiber artist) made a very offensive remark that I won't bother repeating, so I guess any male that does anything related to a fiber art is fair game :/ I wonder how Rosey Grier handles these things? LOL
Clyde,
That's awful! I do try to get men interested in tatting when I demonstrate tatting at places. Some seem to be very interested but are hesitant to be seen actually doing it. I too hope this will change. Hope your partner gets better soon!
Tara
http://tattedlacetreasures.blogspot.com/
If it weren't for my father's tatting, neither my mother nor I would know how. Now with both of my parents gone, we would just be another "lost art" family of tatters. Yes, Dad got the same 3 responses that you describe in your post, and I am sooooo glad that he was not deterred by them.
Best wishes for a speedy recovery for your partner.
Clyde, some of the oldest tatters I have met have been old Navy men. When space is scarce, such a portable hobby is a prize. Plus, there's that whole knot/sailor thing.
A man taught me to tat, too.
Remember, there are parts of the world where knitting & weaving are 'men's jobs.' You'd think people would learn that there are simply people jobs, that anyone who's capable can do them.
Keep tatting and I hope your partner's recovery goes smoothly & uneventfully.
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